Episode 027
Sibling Rivalry…this is a dynamic topic! If you have more than one kiddo, you know that there will be inevitable moments of sibling rivalry: fighting, disagreements, arguing. So what can we do about it? Should we do anything about it?
We as parents bring so much of our own “stuff” to the table when it comes to sibling rivalry. Maybe you didn’t get along well with your siblings growing up. Maybe you still don’t. Maybe that’s motivating you to do whatever it takes to make sure your kids get along—now and in the long term. Maybe you did get along with your siblings and you want your kids to have that same loving relationship…but they’re just not falling into it as easily as you did. Maybe you didn’t have a brother or sister growing up and this whole sibling dynamic is new to you. Maybe you’re part of a blended family and your relationships are layered.
Sibling life. It’s complex. It’s multi-generational. And it’s not talked about openly all the time because it’s one of those areas of parenting where it’s kind of assumed that we should already know what to do. But the truth is: many of us don’t. And as a result we often carry shame, guilt, or frustration around our kids not getting along and us not knowing what to do about it.
That’s why I’ve invited Jailan Heidar onto the show to help us start that conversation and be more open about sibling rivalry. Jailan is a parenting educator and founder of Early Years Parenting. She is a mom of two little ones herself, she has a 5 and 2-year-old. She has been working with families for over 10 years as a certified Positive Discipline Educator. She earned her Master’s of Science in Child & Family Studies from Leiden University and is a certified Early Childhood Educator through UCLA.
Jailan grew up in Egypt and has been living in Europe with her family for over a decade. She is currently living in Munich, Germany and offers parenting consultations both online and in-person, as well as online courses and workshops focused on giving parents tools to get through everyday parenting struggles with ease and build relationships with their children.
Her online course “Raising Siblings without Rivalry” has helped mothers bring their kids closer and have calmer, more peaceful homes with kids who speak with each other more and fight less.
Jailan gives us so many thinking points in this episode:
- Defining positive and respectful parenting
- The benefits of parenting support
- Honoring the individual
- Creating balance with items
- Giving the benefit of the doubt
- Listening
- Awareness
- Reflection
- Taking it one thing, one moment at a time
Tune in and then share your thoughts or start a conversation over on my social media accounts!
Jailan is so patient and supportive. I hope you enjoyed this interview as much as I did. When I let Chris listen to a few snippets, we realized we have a boundary and ownership things we could probably work on and iron out in our own household. And that’s okay! No shame in our learning game. If we find something that works, I’ll be sure to share it over on my Instagram.
If you’re interested, Jailan’s next “Raising Siblings without Rivalry” 6 week course starts soon: on Monday, March 2, 2020.
Jailan’s Links: Early Years Parenting, Instagram and Facebook
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